Thursday, January 22, 2009

Anger Monkey's

I have to get something off my chest. I have some very severe anger monkey's right now, and I just want to rip someone a new asshole.

I will start with a little backstory.

My SIL is living with an abusive man. We have tried everything to get her to leave him, but she won't. He is the father of her child, and she loves him. A big WHATEVER to all of that. Before christmas my husband and I noticed that her little boy had a bruise on his eye. When we asked him about what happened, he told us both (at separate times) that his daddy had hit him. When questioned as to why his dad had hit him, he told us that he didn't know why, he just did. So hubby and I had a talk with SIL. We tried to learn as much as we could about the incident, but she just kept saying she didn't know what had happened, and that it must have been an accident. Hubby and I talked it over for hours, and finally I did what I thought (and still do) was the right thing to do. I called social services and reported the incident. I don't care if SIL wants to put herself in harms way, she is an adult and there is nothing I can do to stop that, however, I can do everything in my power to make sure that her little boy, who is just 5 is not put into harms way. To make a long story much shorter, social services went to her house late at night with the police, and woke her son up. He was scared and confused and would not admit to anything. SIL has admitted to both hubby and I that she lied to the police as her boyfriend and his cousin were both in the house while she was being questioned and she feared for her safety if she had said anything. She then proceeded to ignore all further calls from social services, and when they showed up at her house she ignored the door.

Fast forward to last night. Hubby and I had been out running some errands. We got home and noticed that his mom's car wasn't in the driveway. (She is too sick to drive anymore, but sometimes lets SIL take the car.) He went downstairs to check on his mom, as he always does when we get home from being out, as he is her primary caregiver. SIL and her son were here. He asked about the car and SIL responded that it was at her house.

Okay, still with me so far? Good, cause this is where my anger starts to kick in.

SIL then began to scream at hubby because she is now being investigated for abusing her son - we don't believe that she has ever hurt him, but her ignoring all of the calls and visits from social services has escalated into this. We have tried to tell her that this is what would happen if she continued to ignore them, but she doesn't listen. She screamed at him that he was a f*cking asshole, that this was all of his fault, and that he should have just left things alone. Keep in mind that her son is witnessing all of this, and that this is all happening infront of their dying mother. Things were yelled back and forth between hubby and his sister. She then took a couple of swings at him, at which time he called the cops. Keep in mind that I am upstairs and trying not to get too upset, seeing as I am just under 5 weeks away from giving birth.

Then SIL made a mistake - she threatened hubby. Her exact words were "Just you wait, you're time is coming. Once the baby gets here I am going to make your life hell". I don't take to well to anyone threatening me, but you are now threatening my unborn child.... I saw red. I managed to keep myself upstairs because honestly, I probaby would have punched her if I had gone downstairs.

We dealt with the police - hubby decided not to press charges as she hadn't really hurt him with her punches. Then we got a call from hubby's other sister. Seems SIL who had been scrapping with hubby earlier in the evening was talking to SIL #2 online and was badmouthing both hubby and I, and saying shit that was completely untrue. Hubby was quite upset by all of this, he keeps saying that he just wants to keep his nephew safe.

My anger is coming from a dark place within me. I hate the thought of any child being abused, but when it is your own family, in this case, my nephew, who I have helped care for since birth, I am at my wits end. Hubby is dealing with the stress of this, plus taking care of his mom, plus having a very pregnant wife all at the same time. I can see that this is taking it's toll on him, and i feel like there is nothing that I can do to help him.

This is where my anger kicks in. How can one girl, be so stupid? She isn't here everyday, caring for her mom. She isn't even here once a week. She claims that it is too hard for her to see her mom like this, and yet, she has no problem coming by and getting rent money from her mom, or grocery money, or whatever. The only time she comes over is when she needs something, and otherwise she doesn't even bother to call us and find out how mom is doing.

And now, she is threatening my family???? What The Fuck. If anyone has any ideas, please feel free to share. For now, I am going to try to let the stress go, try to let the anger subside, and hopefully find a way to get my hubby to relax for more than 15 minutes. I love him and I don't want him to stress his way to a heart attack or doing something he will regret later.


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